Random Life Update 3 .0

Hi, to anyone out there actually reading this. I know, I've been away for like a month now. Come to think of it, I don't think I've blogged once after I've moved back to Riyadh. So, anyways, of you're interested, there's a lot to catch up with on my life. Or if you're here to kill time- works both ways.

So yeah, where do I start? When I moved back here, I've been having a lot of spare me time, to be honest. And with lots of time to spare, came lots of boredom. It's like a fucking package. There'd be times when I'd be as bored as a horny slut on her period, you know. And believe me when I tell you, this whole boredom thingy leads you to do a lot of weird stuff. It's 'good' weird, though. However the sad part is, despite having all this free time, I did not blog. There were times when I wanted to, and came so close to writing something, but something pushed me away. Its not that I don't like writing stuff anymore. Heck, don't get me wrong- I love writing. It's just that I've got a habit to start off with most of my stuff on pen and paper, and to be honest with you guys, that's a toil. Even this post, I couldn't be arsed to write it down on paper. So I typed it on my phone, emailed it to my Hotmail account where I stored all my junk, and then, I'd finally copy/paste it to my Blogger dashboard. Gives you an idea of how bummed out I can be, does it not?

One thing you might not know, is that recently, I've sort of become a fan of bhangra music. I won't ask you not to judge me, cause even if I do, there will always be someone out there doing it, right? But anyways, a friend of mine made me listen to a few Bhangra tracks, and well, I was instantly hooked. I think it's mainly because of the fact that you can dance to it. I know I can't dance, but you know that feel when you want to dance, isn't it? I don't think I've ever danced publicly, or even in front of my friends, cause you know, it'd give birth to massive awkwardness. Have you guys watched the Grammy Awards, though? Well, you should've, cause Justin Timberlake made his return to music with a kickass performance featuring Jay Z. Watching that, I got back the love I had for Timberlake's music, and thus, here's one of his songs, which in my opinion, is worth sharing, and never gets old:

This song is love. ♥

Oh and I almost forgot, how did everyone spend Valentine's Day? I'm guessing most of you guys took your significant other to romantic candlelight dinners, got her flowers, chocolates, and possibly, edible flowers coated with chocolate, and all that shit. And me? Ah, don't ask about me, man. I was home, doing nothing. Even though I still like this one girl a lot, but I was forever alone. I never thought I'd fall for her, but the moment I did, my instant reaction was 'Ah fuck!' Save your sympathy showers, though. At times, a lot of people ask me about the person I like, and I've answered with outrageous possibilities. I can handle all that. But every once in a while, someone fucked up comes along, and this happens:

The longer you look at the kid, the funnier it gets.

Anyways, I kinda thought my brother had a Valentine, before 14th Feb came around, but that thought took a different route once a friend showed me a Facebook conversation between my brother and a girl that was supposedly his 'girlfriend'. I didn't get shit, cause you know, they were fighting over some issue that mustve happened between them, which I couldn't figure out, AND it had terrible grammar. Nevertheless, he actually had someone. Mind you, this kid is 10th grade- which I know is not really too early to get into all this relationshippy stuff, but come on, man, he was my brother! He'll always be the kid in diapers, who bit off a piece of flesh from the back of my mother's hand. By the way, did you realize that all the people who were like, "I don't celebrate Valentine's Day, because it's prohibited". I mean, yeah, it is prohibited in Islam, but why the fuck are you pretending to be a person who follows all the other rules our religion states. If you don't have someone to share this special day with, you should stop passing it off as 'Haraam', oh so 'righteous' people

Whatever, my point is, I needed to have someone to blow off time with, and not develop feelings for. But, you know what's annoying, though? It's this girls do- I mean, when you lay off your moves on her, she goes like, "How many girls have you said that to?" Now readers, let's be honest for a second here. Don't we all, guys and girls alike, use the same resume to apply to different jobs?

Moving on to other stuff. You know how I've been planning to move to the United Kingdom for further studies? Well, the other day, my mother discovered that apart from a few cousins, she has one of her college friends living in the UK. So, she contacted her and stuff, caught up after talking for like 2 hours, you know, women. But anyways, even if I actually moved there, I wouldn't be anywhere near them, since they lived in Newcastle. However, I'm guessing her kids have that sexy Geordie accent, which I love. It was all good, until 2 weeks ago. My dad came home from work, and asked me if I'd like to study in Malaysia. I was dumbstruck, because Malaysia wasn't on my mind, even though ALL my friends were going there. My mother kinda approved my dad's idea, cause in Malaysia, I'd become a doctor, quicker. To be honest with you guys, I didn't think too lowly of Malaysia, it's just that- come on man, the United Kingdom, the Premier League football, the Southern british accent, and more importantly- the United fucking Kingdom. Unfortunately, my point didn't come off as too strong to my parents, with their argument being the fact that Malaysia is where all my friends will reside, and I'll have an easier life, and their idea that Britian is 'at the end of the world'. But nevertheless, I applied and got accepted into my course. The only hope I have now- is they still haven't shunned the idea of the UK, yet. The second they do it, well, I'll be damned.

My university of choice in Malaysia has asked for a medical check-up of my body, so a few days ago, I paid a visit to their appointed doctor. They needed a blood sample, which was unbelievably bad news. They had to stick needles in me, and I hated that shit. They guy who was appointed to do the job was sort of young, and struck up a conversation with me.

Doc: You're going abroad for studies?
Me: Yeah.
Doc: What will you be studying?
Me: Medicine.
Doc: Don't worry, now you're in pain. A few years later, you'll be sticking these into people. That's when the fun starts.

The way I see it, the dude had a point. But it also meant that the dude was enjoying himself while I was in pain. At that moment, I started having a lot of hatred for him. Word, if the Lord made us both die that second, I'd take some time out, and personally escort the dude to the gates of Hell, no lie. You know, all this time while I was at the doctor, an important thought crossed my mind. Since I was gonna study Medicine, in a few years, I would be the same person as this doctor- with the lab coat, the personal assistant, the scary looking instruments, AND NO LIFE. So, I devised a rather ingenious plan. After I got done with meds, I'd sign up for a few other courses, and gather enough stuff to be eligible to apply as a doctor in the army. Because normal doctors were too mainstream. I know, dream of hitting it big time. In case of a bump along the road, I am in possession of a Plan B. Which is that I'd take psychology course, and become a therapist. Why you ask? Well...

It's true, and you know it.

Anyways, after all my medical examinations were done, I walked out of the lab. I was treated with the sight of a girl so pretty, that I forgot to look at her boobs. Come on, don't take me as a bad person, I'm being a normal teenager.

Oh, and btw people, I joined Twitter recently. You can follow me @Marzouk_Alam, and if you have any thoughts on my posts, then take a minute to comment below/tweet at me, whatever seems convenient.

Anyways, I gotta go now. Dad just got pizza for the fam, and I hope it's good stuff this time, cause the last time we had pizza, I had a bad experience. The pizzas were sort of burnt of the base. Oh, do you know the similarity between burst pizza, and pregnant women? In both cases, there's one dumbfuck who didn't take it out in time.

Alright, see you guys next week, hopefully. Peace and blessings.