The Mayan Apocalypse? Fuck That Shit

December 22, 2012 here, already. And yet, I live.

I wasn't worried about Jack Squat yesterday, until this came up on the lunchtime bulletin:

Scary, isn't it?

So, it's official- the Mayans have trolled us. Mean bastards.

This is what I did all day, waiting for all hell to break loose.

6 am to 10 am- Dead on my bed, since I spent the previous night watching my favourite comedy movie play list- Zoo Keeper, Ali G InDaHouse, Ted, and The Inbetweeners.

11 am- Still sleeping.

12 pm- My plan was to "wake and bake". Na, I'm just messing. You no do weed, because weed no good. Weed bad. Anyhow, I woke up, and took a shower.

1 pm- The Friday prayer, duh.

2 pm- Food. More food. Followed by pie. And then, more pie.

3 pm- Believe me, I went out of the house expecting to see something amazing. Like, I wanted to see it raining hot rocks or something. Or maybe unicorns strolling. Something out of the ordinary.

4 pm- Since I'm leaving this Monday, I need to get some shopping done, but I couldn't get my lazy butt to agree with me. The result? No shopping.

5 pm- You know, I was really let down, as nothing was happening. Man, they had this really awesome build-up for 21-12-12, and now they don't give me shit? Not cool, man. Not cool.

6 pm- I've sort of given up on the wait. But here's the deal, I'm gonna go out out on a limb here and say, that since Christians strongly believed on the 21-12-12, Jesus might be behind it. Because, just last week, I got email from secret_higher_power@heavenmail.com. The picture he/she emailed me was this.

I'm no Christian, but I find this pretty hilarious.

Okay, on I go, again. Oh, and note that this is my first post that has the "Dear Diary" vibe, right?

7 pm- I do not know if 21-12-12 was someone's idea of a cosmic joke, because sure as hell, it did not seem to be one. But if it was, it was a really bad one. Really bad.

8 pm- I was at my PC, blogging. While I was at it, do you know what my media player was currently playing? "Highway To Hell" by AC-DC. I decided that it was bad choice, should the world end. So, I changed it to "Till I Collapse", by Eminem. Because Eminem had always produced heavenly music. Before REHAB, that is.

9 pm- I watched the 2012 once again, just in case. I googled to look for someone who could lend me a plane, because I really wish to live longer. I haven't been with my crush for once, FFS. You should really see my point, by now.

10 pm- I just found out, that our flight to Riyadh is a transit flight via Dubai. And here's the good part: Instead of shopping for awesome stuff here, I'm going to be doing it in Sharjah. Happiness Level = Max.

11 pm- I figured that if anything was to happen, I would rather go in with a full tummy, as a happy person. So, I downed my dinner, and since I was dankrupt, I stayed clean.

12 am- The wait has now officially ended, and this post is starting to see it's end, as well. Because what I do after 12 am at night, is something that I can't let people know. ;) Na, I just watch movies. I wish I was cold-blooded killer at night, though.

You know, I think the Mayans didn't even do some actual research to support their conclusion. The way I have it, the appointed the best of their geniuses to figure it out, and the appointed ones were promised a life full of stardom, if successful. It is at that point that I think, criminal desperation took over them, and that led on to something. So, here's what they did.

Quite legit, actually.

You know, I've just had the best idea in a good while. If I make it through this, I plan to study, become a doc, marry "the girl", have babies. AND THEN, I'm going to make them watch the movie 2012, and tell them that their mother and I survived through this, just to have the kids. Awesome, isn't it?

Anyways, now that we're past the "Apocalypse", here's to the next 1000 years.

Cheers.

P.S- THIS POST IS A DAY LATE. And, I do not apologize.